‘Security breeches’, ‘consumption of forms’ and adjusting to U.S. English.

Yes, I’ve started work and I’ve immediately accepted the role of chief editor. I had expected that this would form a large part of my role, but I didn’t expect that my most frequent requestor of grammar and word-choice wisdom would be a native English speaker (a recent arrival from Vancouver)......because nearly everything she writes correctly is revised by a non-native speaker to poor English. I believe we spent 15 minutes discussing whether we were required to shorten the title His Excellency, Chief Executive Officer Mr. …….to H.E C.E.O Mr…. or HE CEO Mister…etc. Titles, level of authority and chain of command are extremely important here. I can’t possibly overemphasise this point. I’ve been led to believe that an incorrectly positioned period or the use of Dr. instead of Mr. on a memo could lead to my role being terminated.

I’ve spent my first three days working through a list of 100 medical and clinical policies of the hospital and prioritising those that need urgent revision. Every nurse or hospital employee I’ve met has a favourite policy that they wish me to correct, so hopefully any small changes I can make will have an impact on their work situations and patient care. If the criterion for revision was poor grammar it would be impossible to prioritise. ‘Security breeches’ is my current favourite, used to describe the hospital ‘Code Gray’ or physical threat. I was tempted to change it to chastity-belts but I don’t know my boss well enough to know if a) he would get the joke, or b) he would find it funny.

My colleagues are lovely. I’m sitting at a temporary desk with the worst ergonomics I’ve experienced in a long time. I’m in an office the size of a large bathroom with 5 other women, 4 of whom are from Doo. There are two other women who work on different areas of policy but they’re based in another office and the one who has all the information I need is too busy to provide it unless she absolutely must. It is a tad uncomfortable, but after a grumpy day 2, day 3 was lovely. My boss, whom I’ll call Khalid, is delightful. He’s amusing, has a relatively good grasp of spoken English and has provided clear expectations of me. On day 4, I believe he felt the need to re-assert his authority or remind me that I’m in Doo, as he rang me to complain that I hadn’t left a full line after a question in a memo to make it easier to read(!).

I was in Khalid’s office yesterday when an elderly Dr. telephoned in a panicked state as he was hoping to employee someone who had reported that his second cousin, twice removed was already an employee of the hospital. He wanted a precise definition of ‘close relative’ as written in the conflict of interest policy. After kindly reassuring the Dr. that he needn’t be concerned in his situation, my boss hand-balled the defining task to my to-do list with a giggle.